Call it bad luck, a misstep in planning, plain inaptitude or a combination of the above. I'm not certain what it is exactly that landed me in this quandary; what is evident, however, is the fact that life is veering further and further off-course with every passing day.
I grew up wanting to be a lot of things. When I was in pre-school, the predominant ambition was to be an archaeologist. Further down the line, an air-stewardess, and then an astrophysicist (highly geeky past with a single lucid moment of glamour). Then, somewhere between now and the age when everything was possible, things started going awry, helped eagerly along by mediocre grades.
Working my ass off in JC salvaged things a little by getting me into my dream course. However, the straight A's didn't herald any change for the better; I consistently feel like I'm lagging, sub-par.
So the question is, how far do you go to pursue a dream? Where does the line of reason stand? Passion or practicality -- which is more important?
I don't know, and the feeling that I may be messing up my whole life as of this point frightens me. But most of all I'm scared because the future isn't so distant anymore.
I grew up wanting to be a lot of things. When I was in pre-school, the predominant ambition was to be an archaeologist. Further down the line, an air-stewardess, and then an astrophysicist (highly geeky past with a single lucid moment of glamour). Then, somewhere between now and the age when everything was possible, things started going awry, helped eagerly along by mediocre grades.
Working my ass off in JC salvaged things a little by getting me into my dream course. However, the straight A's didn't herald any change for the better; I consistently feel like I'm lagging, sub-par.
So the question is, how far do you go to pursue a dream? Where does the line of reason stand? Passion or practicality -- which is more important?
I don't know, and the feeling that I may be messing up my whole life as of this point frightens me. But most of all I'm scared because the future isn't so distant anymore.
5 comments:
Passion. That's how I've lived my life.
Play?
bah!: sigh, i've always thought so too, but what if it doesn't provide for you?
so ur feelin real worried huh. i've thought about it quite a number of times. let practicality come first den with that muny go pursue ur passion. alot of adults had their childhood thought up of this way but they nvr got out of the practicality cycle afterwards. well when u grow up jus dun forget wad u had wanted to do in ur youth. life's the real game u onli haf one life.
sarah:
2. Uh, you don't need a sandpaper bum if your legs comfortably rest on the ground while you sit.
3. You mean... you don't remember at all your former schoolmate GEPer (I think you two were never in the same class though) who later went to ACS and then VJC?
4. How dare you! Crysis > all npnp
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