How to Climb a Sand Dune: A Chronology

4:27pm
Drive across the steppes, alongside sand dunes. Unimpressed as dunes not very high. Have seen higher ones in Singapore's sand depository.

4:42pm
Arrive at base of dune. Put on two jackets, scarf, hat and sunglasses as want to be well-protected against sand and wind. Pleased with self re level of foresight and preparation.

4:48pm
Decide that this is like walking on the beach.

4:50pm
Degree of incline changing. A bit tougher now.

4:55pm
Scattering of plants peter out so no footholds left. Guide gives up and waves me on.

5:02pm
Crisis! Slip and fall almost on top of dead camel.

5:15pm
A flash of inspiration. Must be strategic in tackling this. Decide to climb in a zig-zag fashion.

5:20pm
Realise my zig is almost parallel to my zag. 

5:23pm
Thighs burning. Sweat dripping in eyes. Audible huffing. Eerie howling as sands fall away under feet with every step. Sit down for a break and slide down two metres. Damn.

5:40pm

The sand dune is very big. 

5:49pm

Mistily ponder existentialism.

5:55pm

Have enough of zig-zagging. Put head down and climb directly upwards. Feet getting heavier with every step. Literally, with sand.

6:07pm

Look up briefly and am startled. Five steps from top! Observe slight hysteria.

6:10pm

Claw self onto ridge. A moment of exultation! 

6:15pm

Wave furiously at guide near base. Quickly realise mistake as balance is lost and foot slips backward. Decide to sit down as not wise to fall off wrong side of dune.

6:30pm

Slide back down the dune. Sand everywhere in periphery, and in shoes and underwear.

Four days to hot shower.